


when the heart grows wings

by Morwen (MorrPhyc)



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Angst; H/C; Horror;, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-13
Updated: 2010-01-13
Packaged: 2017-10-06 06:24:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorrPhyc/pseuds/Morwen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Buffy wants Giles to stay and takes him someplace they can be alone and talk. But there's evil waiting for them and it wants her Watcher dead. Can Angel and Wes help before it's too late?</p>
            </blockquote>





	when the heart grows wings

  
Buffy went over her mental list one more time, hoping she had everything she need for the afternoon. Picnic basket, with food, CD’s and portable player, blanket, cooler, with water and iced tea, and what was she forgetting?

“Buffy!” Willow had been trying to get Buffy’s attention for the past five minutes.

“What, Will,” came the somewhat distracted reply.

Willow sighed in resignation, knowing that Buffy would be this way until the thing with Giles was all over. “Buffy, are you sure about this?” She was hesitant to bring it up again, but felt it was important for Buffy to be certain of her motives.

Buffy’s cry of realization rang through the room. “I know! The box, I didn’t get the box. God, how could I forget to pack that?” She ran upstairs to her bedroom to retrieve it.

Willow rolled her eyes and leaned against the wall waiting for her to come back downstairs which she did a moment later, a small box clutched tightly to her chest.

Determined to have this conversation, Willow snagged her arm, forcing Buffy to face her. “Are you sure?”

Buffy jerked her arm away but didn’t move knowing Willow wouldn’t let this go. Just as she knew she could ruin everything today if she did something wrong. “I’m trying, Willow, I really am. I-I want to do this right. I-he, I need him back. I need him to stay.” Desperation was gathering in her grey eyes. “He has to stay this time, Will. And he leaves tomorrow.” She walked over to the basket and put the box carefully inside before gazing out into the morning sunshine.

Willow walked over to her friend and placed a hand on her shoulder, speaking gently. “Buffy, I-I’m sorry, but do you really think he’ll want to? Or that, well, that it would be right for you to ask? I mean when he found out about you and Spike –” Willow bit her lip.

Buffy stiffened and her whole body flushed with embarrassment as she remembered the look on Giles’ face when he walked in on her with Spike. He’d sagged against the wall and Spike, being Spike, had made it even worse with his lewd comments. She’d tried to get Giles to talk to her but all he said was that perhaps it was best if he simply returned to England.

Giles had said something that had confused her at the time but now made perfect sense. He’d said he couldn’t do it again. He couldn’t live through it again and come out sane. Then he’d simply left, without looking back, no matter how she’d cried for him to come back. Buffy still wondered at the intensity of that reaction. She had felt as if her world had come to an end and just thinking about it caused pinpricks of pain and fear at every nerve ending.

“He was so hurt, Will. I-I didn’t know he cared for me that way. Honest.” She turned to find Willow regarding her with penetrating eyes. She flushed with guilt and shame, dropping her gaze. “Okay, so maybe, somewhere inside I knew that,” she paused, needing to say this right, “that he loved me.”

Buffy shook her head knowing this wasn’t working, dragged her friend over to the couch, and pulled her down. She gripped Willow’s hands tightly, knowing that if her best friend couldn’t believe her, then Giles never would. “Spike made me feel. That doesn’t mean I liked it. But at least I felt something, even if it was only anger and hatred.” She sank back into the cushions, remembering and shuddered. “I was so lost. And he had left me. I couldn’t believe that he would leave me, Will. I thought Giles would be the one to never leave.” Her eyes grew hard as she looked at the basket on the coffee table. “But he did. And there was nothing.” She couldn’t stop the tears that fell as she again felt the pain of that betrayal.

Willow sighed as she pulled her friend into a comforting embrace. Buffy seemed to cry all the time these days, well these days since Giles had come back. Almost as if she was finally free to allow herself to feel something other than the constant anger she’d been radiating since he’d moved back to England.

She had known for sometime that Giles loved Buffy, to her it was obvious. So much so that she often wondered how much more he could take before it destroyed him completely. Now she knew. Giles had come back to help and Buffy tried to throw off all responsibility to him. She treated him as if he were there to serve no other function but the handling of the routine and mundane things in her life. And she gave him no thanks, no time, and even less consideration.

So Willow wasn’t surprised when he decided to return to England. Willow shook her head. And yet, here he was again. Dawn had called him, telling him Buffy needed him and begged him to come back. And Giles being Giles - had.

Only, on the very day he arrived, he had found Buffy with Spike together in the training room and even though Willow didn’t know what was said, the result was that Giles was already leaving again. His flight was tomorrow and none of them had seen him since that day in the Magic Box. He’d stayed in his hotel room, refusing all calls.

Willow was worried about him, they all were. No one had seen either Giles or Spike for two days and it was grating on her nerves. Buffy had taken charge then, going straight to Giles’ room last night, demanding to see him. And now, they were to meet today.

Willow’s reverie was broken when Buffy pulled away, wiping her eyes and grinning sheepishly. “Sorry, Will, I can’t seem to stop with the waterworks.”

Willow patted her hand. “That’s okay, Buff, as long as you can cry it’s a good thing.”

Buffy nodded in response, before giving her friend and sideways glance. She took a deep breath. “I think I love him, Willow.”

The redhead looked at her in shock. “What? Who? Spike? Oh Buffy, no.”

Buffy jumped off the couch stung. “Spike? You think I could love that – that vampire?”

Cool green eyes searched hers deeply. “Well, it wouldn’t be the first time now would it?”

A stab of anguish shot through Buffy and she slid down the wall to the floor. “That was really cruel, Will.”

Willow shook her head and walked over to where Buffy had crumpled. She lifted Buffy’s chin, needing her to understand. “Imagine it, Buffy. Me, saying something that hurt you. Giles has lived with that from you for years.”

Buffy shook her head. “No, I can’t do that. That’s past, Will. It’s past.” She stood abruptly and walked over to the coffee table, putting the final items in the basket, her hands shaking. “I-I can do it. I know I can. I need him, Will. He has to stay.”

Willow cried out in frustration, “Buffy, don’t you get it? You’re still only thinking about you! What about Giles?”

Buffy whirled on her; “He’s my Watcher. He belongs to me. I don’t get to leave, neither does he.”

The redhead walked up to her, confusion in her eyes. “What did you mean, Buffy? Is he your property? Your personal doormat? What? You love him? Giles? Or are you just willing to tell him that to get him to stay?”

Something Willow couldn’t quite identify flickered in Buffy’s eyes before she turned and picked up her basket and various items. “I’ll be late. We’re going out to the old lighthouse.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out her cell phone and handed it to Willow. “I know you have things to do with Tara today but keep track of the Munchkin. And make her eat supper and no TV for her tonight. She flunked that math test.”

Before she could say anything, Buffy had her keys and was out the door. Willow watched her drive off, knowing that Giles would stay. No matter how much pain it caused him, Buffy would make him stay.

\----------------------------------

Cordy fell with a cry of pain as the images flashed through her head. Angel was at her side, catching her before she hit the floor. He simply held her and waited for the vision to release her. Slowly he felt her relax and pained eyes shot open as words tumbled out in a rush. “Giles a-and Buffy … a lighthouse … stormy … and a demon, like nothing I’ve seen.” She was still breathing hard but the visions faded fast and she wanted to remember it all. “I saw Giles, blood everywhere … Buffy was screaming … he looked dead. Oh, Angel, he looked dead!”

She was hysterical and Angel pulled her to him needing to calm her, though he too was feeling a sense of panic. He kept his voice calm, “Cordy, tell me about the demon.”

He felt her shake her head against his chest. “It was big, ugly. A nasty set of fangs … t-two curved horns a-and a tail. Long claws and,” she pulled back, confusion coloring her pale face, “armor? Or was that its skin? I don’t know but it was grey. Red glowy eyes and like sharp spikes around its head and down its back in double rows. And tall, way tall. It was calling for Giles. It’s Giles it wanted. Or it wanted something Giles had? I’m not sure. That’s all I saw.”

Angel sank back on his heels not knowing what to think but spoke aloud to himself. “I thought Giles was in England?”

Wes’ cultured tones answered him. “As did I. Perhaps we should ring Buffy.”

Angel turned to the other man and smiled. “And just how long have you been standing there?”

Wes quirked an eyebrow in response. “I believe I first heard ‘blood everywhere’. If Rupert is indeed in danger, we must warn him.”

Angel helped Cordy to the couch then pulled his phone out of his pocket, punching in numbers as he nodded his agreement.

“Hello.”

Hearing Willow and not Buffy only added to Angel’s worry. “Willow, its Angel. Is Buffy there?”

He could hear the hesitation in her voice as she answered. “No, Angel, she isn’t. She, um, won’t be back until tonight.”

Not knowing how to bring it up without sounding strange he just asked. “Is Giles there by chance?”

He heard her sharp intake of breath. “Um, well, he is in Sunnydale, but not here.”

Angel swore under his breath. “Willow, I, well, Cordy had a vision. Giles and Buffy. They’re in danger. I have to talk with one of them.”

Willow was obviously flustered as she replied, “Oh, that just sucks. Buffy left over an hour ago and she – I have her cell. She and Giles were going on a, um, well, it’s kinda hard to explain, but they needed to talk, away from everyone. So she’s taking him to the old lighthouse. Ask Cordy, she’ll know where it is. It’s like two hours from here but I think it’s a bit closer for you guys.” Willow’s voice filled with worry and panic. “Buffy has the Jeep and Xander’s out of town. I don’t have a way to – please tell me you’ll go, Angel.”

Angel checked his watch speaking almost absently as he did mental calculations. “Of course, Willow. Wes and I are on our way. We won’t let anything happen to them, I promise you that.”

He heard her sigh in relief. “Good. Cause I refuse to have to tell Dawn that some big bad got Buffy.”

He gripped the phone tightly, “You won’t, Willow.”

“Call me as soon as you know something, please. And hurry.” Willow hung up.

Angel slowly placed the phone back in his pocket before checking to make certain Cordy was okay. She nodded to him without either of them having to say a word.

He turned to ask Wes a question, only to find him gone. Angel shook his head, knowing Wes was already looking for the relevant books to take with them to research to demon. He turned back to Cordy. “Cordy, Willow said I should ask you about the lighthouse. She said you’d know where it was.”

Cordy snorted, “It was that lighthouse? I couldn’t make it out clearly. But, yeah, I do. Xander and I used to go there. I used to think it was so romantic of him, the jerk.” She brushed her hair out of her face as she walked over to her desk and pulled out a map. She pointed, directing Angel. “See? It’s down here. If you follow this road to the coast, you’ll see it. But the road to it is sorta hidden. When you get about, oh, maybe two miles past the sharp curve after you see the lighthouse, look to your left. It’s a narrow dirt road, kinda overgrown now since hardly anyone goes there anymore.” Her brows knitted in concern. “It’s gonna take you almost two hours to get there.”

Angel nodded in agreement as he folded the map and put it in his pocket. “All the more reason for us to leave now.”

Again, Wes broke in. “Well I’m ready. I have Deagon’s Guide, Black’s Index and Lotheren’s Index, fifth edition. Our demon should be in one of them.”

Cordy pushed Angel towards the door. “Go. Gunn, Fred, and I will keep things going ‘til you guys get back. Just get to them in time okay?”

Angel gave her a short acknowledgement before he and Wes were out the door leaving Cordy sending a prayer to the Powers to let all four of them come back alive.

\-----------

They had left the sounds of the city far behind and were now winding down a beautiful forested road heading to the coast. Neither had yet to say more than simple pleasantries to the other and Buffy was feeling decidedly uncomfortable.

Giles sat in the passenger seat looking out at the view, the road, anywhere but her. Buffy, however, found she was having a hard time watching anything but him. He had on loafers, a pair of well-worn jeans and a rich green polo shirt, all of which fit him way too well and in all the right places. It caused her no end of discomfort at the thoughts she was having about those jeans.

Buffy felt almost childish in her pink tank top and white crop pants with the pink flowers. Maybe if she hadn’t put on the pink bandanna which was coming off the minute she stopped the Jeep, she wouldn’t feel quite so childish. And she couldn’t understand why it mattered so much that Giles see her as a woman, not a girl.

She glanced at him yet again. When did he start to look so young? When he left her? That thought caused Buffy no end of guilt as to what she was about to do. She cast another glance and realized Giles knew what she was up to. Just as Buffy knew that if she asked, this time, he would stay. He loved her and he would stay even if all she ever did was throw that back in his face. Giles couldn’t leave her again, she could feel it. Every time she looked at him she could see the guilt he felt. Buffy swallowed hard. She didn’t want to hurt him anymore. Yet if she forced him to stay, that’s what would happen. And worse, she would loose him. She would gain a Watcher and loose her Giles. It would be too much for him; she could destroy him with a single word. But no power on earth could keep her from saying it.

As she looked at him again, she saw the weariness in his features, the knowledge of the inevitable and his inability to deny her anything anymore. He looked like a condemned man and she was the one holding the axe.

Insane, I must be insane to do this. Just like Lizzie, she thought hysterically. Lizzie Borden took an axe … She shuddered violently and forced her attention back to the road, desperately needing a distraction from her morbid thoughts.

Buffy saw the road she needed to turn on to reach the lighthouse and took it. Within a few more minutes, the lighthouse filled the sky. Buffy stopped in the clearing, turned off the ignition, but didn’t move, being very unsure as to what to do next. Giles however seemed capable of movement. He opened the door and stepped out into the fresh air and sunshine.

Buffy pulled the bandanna off her head and threw it on the backseat. She got out, moved to the back of the Jeep, and started pulling things out. Giles joined her and as they each reached for the basket and their hands touched. They both jolted back from the unexpected contact.

Her heart was in her throat but she finally found her voice. “I’ll do this, Giles. Why don’t you just take the blanket and spread it out somewhere smooth, okay?” She was proud that her voice hardly shook at all.

As it was he noticed and speared her with a piercing gaze before agreeing. “If you prefer, Buffy.”

He picked up the blanket and walked out into the clearing. When he was gone Buffy hit her head against the rear door repeatedly. Get a grip, catch your breath, and stop acting like a teenager with a crush. She had to laugh at herself. Giles, she was acting this way over Giles. She shook it off, refusing to examine what that meant. She was here for a reason and nothing would change that. Her resolve firmly in place, she grabbed the last of the items, closed the rear door and walked over to meet Giles. He had put the blanket in a perfect spot; the sun shone on the water and the sound of the ocean filled her with a sense of calm.

Her Watcher had walked a little distance ahead and was gazing at the ocean, his back to Buffy. She settled the things on the blanket quietly, not wanting to disturb him and ended up watching him. She saw his broad shoulders and strong back and the way his body flowed so beautifully over a firm attractive butt to long muscular thighs and calves. She was almost overwhelmed with the need to touch him. Before she even realized it, she was up and walking towards him, placing her hands flat on his back, relishing the feel of him. But at her touch, Giles whirled around, shocked.

Buffy pulled her hands back and clasped them together or she would have touched him again. To cover her crazed emotions she ad-libbed, “I just, um, the picnic is ready.” And she ran back to the blanket, sat down, and began setting out the food.

Giles watched her, too stunned to move. He didn’t know what to think anymore. She was uncomfortable around him, that much was obvious. He rubbed the bridge of his nose wearily. Her touch had done more the surprise him, it had electrified him. He gazed at her again, her hair shining like liquid gold in the sun. He wanted to touch it, to see if was a soft as he’d imagined. He turned back to the ocean feeling foolish. Never would he touch her, hold her, love her. His eyes closed, hiding the pain floating in them.

Buffy would ask him to stay. How could he deny her this? Wasn’t it his place to assist her? Should she be held to blame for his ridiculous emotions? He was not her concern, she was his. He had forgotten that and left her and the guilt of it had almost destroyed him. He couldn’t do it again, if she wanted him, needed him, he would comply with what she asked. He had never mattered in this and never would and that was how it was to be. Still, deep within that untouched part of him, he cried in pain at the thought that she would hurt him so deeply and with so little regard. He squelched it down. He was a Watcher. And that’s all he was. Emotions were for those who could afford them, he no longer could. If he didn’t let them go, it would be the end of him. He laughed without sound or humor and a cold shiver ran through him. Giles crossed his arms over his chest then turned his back on himself and went to serve his Slayer.

Buffy didn’t look up until she heard him sit down across from her. As she reached for a sandwich, to offer to him, she caught his expression and froze. His eyes were empty as if someone had drained them of everything but color. “Giles?”

He didn’t answer, merely took the sandwich from her with a soft thank you and reached in the cooler for drinks, handing her a water and tea for himself. The silence continued to grate on her and before she could stop herself, her bottled up anger and fear lashed out. “I can’t take this anymore. I know you’re upset but what gives you the right to judge me? Spike and me are none of your business. You have no right to be angry with me. But I do – with you. And I am.” Her eyes flashed as her anger poured out. “How could you, Giles? You left me. How could you do that? You left me alone! I didn’t know how to – or where-” she broke off suddenly, shaking her head. “You tell me, what gives you the right to be angry? I don’t – I shouldn’t have to explain anything to you.” Her heated words spent, Buffy felt the flush creeping up her skin and dropped her head, not able to face him. She toyed with her water bottle, mentally slapping herself, but it was too late to take it back.

Giles felt each word as a physical blow. He felt his control slipping under the assault of her anger. He responded to her, as he knew he had to, though the words burned in his throat. “I q-quite agree. I-I have no right to any expectations from you.” No emotions escaped him. His voice remained flat, as empty as he felt.

Buffy felt tears sting her eyes, knowing what she was doing to him. She was forcing him back into his box, a Watcher, nothing more. She screamed in her head, he loves you! How can you do this to him? Stop it! Stop it before you can’t. She couldn’t. “But I should from you don’t you think? I mean you are my Watcher.” She looked up wanting to see his face once more and found him studying his hands.

“Yes, Buffy. I am and ever shall be,” he whispered as his control began to desert him. She truly was doing this to him.

Her spine stiffened even as her heart cramped with pain. She spoke the word forcefully. “Stay.”

He drew his knees up, wrapping his arms around them, needing the support. He took a shaky breath. “Yes.”

No longer able to bear what she was doing to him, she pushed past her fear. Tears filled her voice and she took his hand. “Talk to me Giles, please. Tell me what to say. How to make this okay for you. I need you to stay but I-I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I-I – Giles please.”

He gripped her hand tightly in response and lifted his head to find her watching him, concerned. “What would you have me say Buffy? I’ve no right to explanations, I’ve no choice in this. What is there left for me to say? It’s done.”

Buffy could hear the weariness in his words and suddenly wanted to take back everything she’d said but the words came out before she could stop them. “I know, Giles. That you love me. I know you’re in love with me.”

His hand tightened around hers painfully and he turned his head away.

Her free hand covered their painfully joined ones. “I know, Giles. Sometimes you can’t hide it. You watch me and I catch that look in your eyes. Or the way you touched me sometimes. I’ve known for a year or so well at least sorta knew. But since you came back, I knew without a doubt.”

He gave her a penetrating look as he pulled his hand from hers. “How do you expect me to respond, Buffy?”

She smiled, “How about honestly.”

He cocked an eyebrow and nodded, “Yes, I supposed that is generally the correct course of action.” Not understanding the sudden change in her, he was somewhat at sea. Sill, he knew with certainty this was something she would not welcome. “Buffy, i-it doesn’t matter. I am deeply – regretful – that you are aware of this. I never meant to burden you with it. And you’ve no cause to be concerned. I-I would never presume that you – I can’t do this, Buffy.” He was desperate to end this.

Buffy dropped her eyes to her hands. “I know that Giles. A-and I’m sorry too. Really, I am.”

He was awash in conflicting emotions. His resolve had gone the moment she had touched him. It gave him hope that maybe she did care, that she truly meant for him to stay as more that just a Watcher, that perhaps he could be a part of her life in some way. He reached for her hand. “Buffy?”

Her eyes flew up and she saw the change in him and it was electrifying. He was electrifying, his touch searing her to her core. Fear overwhelmed her. She couldn’t love him, she couldn’t – he’d leave if she did, she knew it – she knew it. She pulled away abruptly, shaking. “Don’t. I just want my Watcher.” Her eyes pleaded. “I just want things the way they were.”

He stiffened and pulled back, standing quickly as she again cut him through the heart. “The way things were?”

Buffy didn’t respond but gripped her water bottle so tightly it burst, the water running down her hand and arm.

Giles sighed in resignation. “I see. If you don’t mind, I’d rather be alone for a while.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and cast a final glance a Buffy, who’d yet to move. “I shan’t be too long, I simply – it didn’t have to be this way,” he said, the last barely above a pained whisper, before turning and walking to the path that would take him to the lighthouse.

He was halfway to the lighthouse before she moved, flinging herself down, giving into the tears burning her throat and eyes. She pulled the small box out of the basket and opened it. It was a microchip. She had wanted to give it to him, to explain things. But she was so afraid. Afraid he would leave her again. She couldn’t let herself love him; it would only hurt her in the end. Buffy looked at the chip, wondering yet again how it had survived. She put it back in the box and let her tears fall, letting all the pain she’d kept inside flow out in a torrent as she cried her heart out.

\--------------------------

“I found it, Angel. At least I think I have.” Wesley’s brows creased in confusion. “This makes no bloody sense.”

“What is it, Wes? We still have about an hour to go.”

Wes glanced at Angel. “It’s daylight, Angel and still will be. What do you think you can do?”

Angel shrugged, “Maybe nothing. But I’ll be there and if it’s in the lighthouse, then I can help. We just have to wait and see. Now tell me about the demon and why it doesn’t make sense.”

Wesley ran his hand down the page. “I believe it’s a Debbouch demon. Very nasty. Scales strongly resemble armor. Everything matches. Nasty bugger. It can only be killed by a stab through the soft tissue of the throat. Given its height and defenses that will prove difficult.” He continued reading. “Hmm, this is interesting. It possesses magical properties. I wonder if that’s the link to Rupert?”

Angel interrupted before Wes became too lost in research. “Um, Wes, the demon. Why would it go after Giles?”

The former watcher shook his head. “I’ve no idea. It makes no sense. Debbouchs are violent and rather bloodthirsty, but I can find no reason for it to have sought out Rupert. They are intelligent and as I said capable of calling magic but most are solitary creatures, shunning contact save for when they hunt. It makes little sense.”

Angel checked his watch again wanting time to speed up. “Maybe Giles and Buffy are just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Whatever the reason, we need to get there.”

Wes cast a glance at Angel. “It’s been a long time since you’ve seen her hasn’t it?”

Angel’s only answer was to tighten his grip on the stirring wheel.

“I only bring it up as I know you were informed of her new companion.”

Angel snorted, “Oh, yes, I know all about her and Spike. My sources in Sunnydale tell me more than I want to know sometimes. And I don’t want to talk about it. Buffy and I are long past.” At Wesley’s doubtful look he added, “No, I don’t think she’s doing a smart or safe thing but it’s her life. Honest Wes, it’s past.” He gave Wesley a penetrating look. “And I’m looking to the future.” He turned his attention back to the road, leaving Wes to wonder at what he meant.

\-----------------------------

Buffy lay still, her tears had finally dried up and she was left with only one thought. She loved him. She could no more stop loving him than she could stop breathing. She simply had to get past her fears. Buffy rolled on her back, watching the birds float across the sky with wings spread.

She was afraid. That’s what it all came down to. To her it had made sense. He left because he cared for her, so he should stay if he thought she didn’t care for him. It wouldn’t hurt her this time if he left, if only she could stop caring about him.

She shook her head. It didn’t make sense to her anymore. The look on his face, the emptiness in his eyes told her he could never stop caring just as the tightness in her chest told her the same. Her thoughts jumbled as she watched the birds. One bird spread its wings and took flight, joining with the others high in the sky. Her brows drew together as she watched it fly higher and higher, dip and spin before once again, joining the rest of the flock. The tightness in her chest eased as she watched them fly. One more left the rocky ground and joined them. She wiped her eyes knowing that that’s what she had to do. Leave the ground and take flight. She needed to spread her wings and fly without fear of falling.

Buffy sat up slowly, rubbing the back of her hand across her damp cheek. Damn, why couldn’t she have figured this out before she did that to him? Why was she always acting before thinking? She had to fix this, today, now. She couldn’t let him believe the lie. Buffy raised her eyes to the sky again, the birds now a distant cloud on the horizon. She wouldn’t force him to stay, if he wanted to leave, Buffy would let him go. Just thinking about it caused a sharp pain in her chest and she finally got what Willow was trying to tell her. All that Giles had done, he had done for her. Not for himself. It was time for her to do the same for him. Buffy sighed, “Love can really suck sometimes.”

She looked around for Giles but didn’t see him so she started putting all the uneaten food back in the basket then brought it and everything else back to the Jeep. At the last minute, she grabbed the box and shoved it in her pant pocket. Buffy looked at the lighthouse as it loomed over the ocean and started walking to the path that would take her to Giles.

\----------------------------------

Giles walked rapidly toward the lighthouse, needing to distance himself from Buffy. He felt too much grief to be able to hide it from her. He truly was a fool. She had all but told him he was nothing more to her than a tool to be used and put away till needed again.

He removed his glasses and rubbed his sore eyes before replacing them and walking up to the lighthouse door. He placed his hand against the cold metal handle and turned it, pushing against the old wooden door as he did so. The unused hinges creaked in protestation but the door gave way. The moment he crossed the threshold he felt the cold, stark presence of dark magic. He quickly stepped back but the door slammed shut of its own volition. Giles turned and pulled at the door, his panic rising when he was unable to open it. He could feel the magic it had been sealed with to trap him inside. Above him on the stairwell he heard a scraping that grew louder and louder, closer, descending. He swallowed hard, turned slowly around, and saw a shadow growing larger as the scraping sound came closer still.

Suddenly, the demon filled his vision as it continued to approach him. Giles felt his throat go dry as he recognized it. A Debbouch demon.

“You can’t get out, human.” The sound of its voice was guttural and Giles looked around for anything to use as a weapon. The demon was almost on him and Giles lashed out with a kick, hitting the demon in its abdomen and ran toward the stairs. The demon roared in anger and caught him before he reached the third step. It sank its claws into his shoulder and pain ripped through Giles as his blood began to stain his shirt in an ever-widening pattern. The demon tore part of the blood soaked shirt away and smelled it before tearing it and chewing it, relishing the taste of the blood.

“I’ve been waiting for you, human.” Its jaws almost touched Giles’ face and he tried to turn away but he was pinned to the wall by the claws that were still embedded in his shoulder. He was gasping for breath, finding each consecutive one more painful than the last. “W-what do you want w-with me?” Each word reverberated in his chest sending waves of pain shooting through his limbs. He felt the demon’s hot acrid breath on his skin as it wrapped its free hand tightly around his throat. “I want you to die.”

\-------------

“Look, the lighthouse.” Wes pointed ahead directing Angel’s attention. “My God, what the bloody hell is happening?”

Right before their eyes, thick black clouds were swirling around the top of the lighthouse, solidifying into a blanket of darkness that was releasing tendrils of lightening, the sound heard even from where they were.

Angel watched the growing darkness grimly. “I don’t know, Wes, but whatever it is, it can’t be good.” Angel saw the sharp curve in the road. “Wes, keep an eye out for a road, on the left. It’ll be just past the curve. Cordy says it’s a bit overgrown.”

Wes nodded his agreement but continued to cast concerned glances to the unnatural sky, hoping they would not arrive too late.

\-------------------------------

Buffy pulled with everything she had to open the door. She could still hear that bone-chilling roar in her head and knew something really bad was in there with Giles. The Slayer was nearly insane with her need to get to her Watcher nothing she did opened the damn door. She started circling, looking for another way in, but there was nothing, no other way. In desperation she beat on the door, crying out. “Giles! Giles! I can’t … I can’t get in. Oh God, be okay, till I can get in.”

A crash of lightening hit the ground near her and she jumped in absolute shock. She backed up from the lighthouse and saw the darkness gathering. It was like no storm she’d ever seen. Definitely not natural.

“Oh, shit, this is not good. Nope, not good at all.” As soon as she said it she was pummeled with ice cold rain that was now falling in torrents. Still, she didn’t leave; her need to get to Giles was her only controlling thought. So desperate was she to get in, she failed to notice the creature rising from the ocean behind her or that once on land, it began to walk directly towards her.

\--------------------------------------

The demon slowly pulled its claws from Giles’ shoulder and released him. Giles fell to the ground gasping for breath. The demon knelt over him. “It is time to begin the ritual. The magic in your blood is strong. It will free me.”

The demon began chanting and while Giles did not understand the language he understood the tone and felt the pinpricks of magic on his skin. It was casting a spell. Giles tried to move, but the demon again wrapped its hand around Giles’ throat, pulling him into a sitting position, and slamming him against the wall.

Giles’ vision swam as the pain shot through him. He watched in horror as the claws again descended and sliced his chest from shoulder to waist. The cut wasn’t deep but painful and he hissed in pain and relief as the claws withdrew. His relief was short-lived and it was only moments before he was crying out in agony. His blood was on fire, burning him, from the inside out. He could barely breathe; the pain was so intense, searing him.

The demon let him go and finished its chant. Suddenly, the fire within Giles began cooling and he slumped over, curling into a ball as small jolts of pain continued to play on his senses. He was soaked with sweat and blood and trying desperately to catch his breath.

The demon heard the lightning strike outside and growled in anticipation. “The darkness gathers quickly, human. Your blood is strong indeed. We must wait. The next stage will come soon enough.”

The demon reached for him and Giles recoiled, dreading the claws. “Wait,” he gasped out, “What-what is this f-for? W-what rit-tual?” He could say no more. He was drained. The demon reached for him again and this time it pulled him painfully to his feet, dragged him upstairs, and threw him into a darkened room. Giles landed against the far wall with a groan as his shoulder connected with the concrete wall and he slid down, no longer even capable of standing.

“What is it for? You will free me, human. Your magic blood is the key to unlock the door of my prison. But I need it all. The ritual is in three stages. The darkness has been called. Next I will call the power of the darkness to you. You will be the vessel. It will burn away the blood within you until none remains and it fills you completely. Then it will be mine to command as I draw it into me.” It made a sound of pleasure. “It will be a most painfully long death, human. We begin again soon.” It bolted the door shut behind it, leaving Giles in total darkness.

He was shivering from the damp as well as too much blood loss. Giles was unable to move, the pain was too great. He closed his eyes and thought of anything but the burning in his shoulder and chest. He saw her as he began to fade; her blonde hair, changeable eyes, her fierce spirit, her strength. His Slayer. As consciousness fled, he held to her, wanting that to be the last thing he saw before he died.

\-------------------------------------

Buffy was saturated but it did nothing to quell her anger and panic at each futile attempt to get into the lighthouse. Finally, she could do no more than fall to her knees in front of the door and scream in frustration.

“It will not work. You cannot pass the boundary.”

Buffy whirled at the sound of the lilting voice directly behind her, mentally cursing herself for not knowing the demon was there. She took a defensive stance, eyeing her opponent. It was a demon she was unfamiliar with, though its webbed hands, feet and scaled skin contrasted sharply with the sad eyes gazing curiously at her. She relaxed somewhat when she sensed no threat.

A deafening crash of thunder shook the ground, sending glass raining down on them from one of the now shattered lighthouse windows. Too high to reach, Buffy back away from the lighthouse, pulling the creature with her. “Why? Why can’t I get in there but Giles could? And what the hell is in there with him? I have to get in there.” The look in her eyes caused the creature to back up a step in recognition.

“I am not one of evil, Slayer. I am one of the Hauffern. My name is Majur. Many of my kind share your human blood. I am no threat to you or to any.”

Buffy gestured back to the lighthouse, her anger growing once again. “One more time, why can’t I get in there when he did and what is in there?”

“You cannot enter because of the spells cast here to contain the beast within the walls. It is a Debbouch demon. A true thing of evil.”

Buffy felt her skin crawl. “Spells? What spells? And how did Giles pass through it if I can’t?”

Majur tilted his head to the side, watching her, as if deciding something. “This Giles is important to you?”

Buffy bit back her frustration at Majur’s time consuming questions which were not getting her the answers she needed. Even so, she almost laughed at the image of they must make; a bedraggled woman standing in the pouring rain making small talk with something that looked like the alligator-man seen at the fair last month.

Another bolt of lightening hit the ground, closer to the lighthouse than the last one, causing her to shiver. “Yes, yes, he is very important to me. Please, if you know, tell me how to get to him. And the demon, how do I kill it?”

“That I do not know. I could not do it. Though I am not as strong as a Slayer. Two years ago, it killed my mate. She would come here often, and watch the water meet the sky.” Majur glanced toward the blurred horizon. “It killed her. Here, in this spot.” He looked back at Buffy, pain etched on his features. “It was going to eat her. I could not let it do that. I came too late to stop it from killing her, but I would not let it do that. My kind possess magic but not strong magic. I was enraged, seeing her lying there, not moving. That gave me the strength I needed and my spell was strong enough to stun it and force it into the lighthouse. Before it recovered its senses, I sealed it inside.”

Buffy reached out and touched his arm. “I’m sorry, about your mate. I truly am. I need to know more about the spell. Spells can be broken. Giles got in somehow, so there’s got to be a way. Help me find it. Giles is my mate, please, don’t let it take him from me.”

Majur’s voice was filled with sadness. “I am sorry, Slayer, sorry for your mate and for you. I sealed the spell with our blood, hers and mine. My mate was of mixed blood, human and demon. Only human and demon blood, given freely, can open the way in. The only way out is the death of the demon. Your mate entered through the door. The Debbouch has been chipping away at the spells I cast. It wants its freedom. All it has been able to do is tear the boundary enough to allow someone to enter. It opens only to those beings possessing strong magic. The Debbouch has not the magic to keep the door open and only the strongest of magics can call the darkness it needs to be freed. The door only opens to magic. Then it seals the being inside and the demon uses them to try to call the darkness that will release it.” He glanced at the black sky, “I have felt it call the darkness three times before but none have done this. Your mate must have strong magic indeed.”

Buffy nodded in agreement, her mind racing. “Wait, you said human and demon blood could open it. So, you’re the demon part and I’m the human part.”

Majur shook his head. “As I said I used my blood to seal the spell. My blood cannot be used to break it. Nor can any of my kind. I am sorry for this. I wanted to be certain no one entered. So it must be freely given as I said, but it must also be given out of love, for each other, as she and I once had. I did not know the Debbouch would be able to tear a hole in the spell or I never would have done such a thing. I loved my mate. I knew none would release that beast out of love, it made sense to me to trap it with something it could never understand.”

Majur looked pleadingly at her. “I only meant to trap it. Not to let harm come to others. I tried many times to close the door it made, but I never could. So my kind have spent these years keeping others away from here but as none came any longer, we grew lax in our watch.”

Buffy’s eyes glittered in the rain. “You mean to tell me I have to have a demon and a human that, what, love each other and just happen to be willing to let me have some of their blood at the same time?”

He nodded slowly.

A deep voice cut through the rain. “Well, it sounds like you need us.”

Buffy turned, shocked at hearing the familiar voice, and found Angel and Wes, equally soggy, standing a few feet away.

She raised an eyebrow, wanting to ask what they were doing there, when a tortured, sound filled the air. Her heart almost stopped. She ran back to the lighthouse and again heard the sound, only this time she knew what it was. Giles. The others ran to meet her as the thick black blanket of sky began to swirl, forming molten red clouds and the rain changed to a thick hot mist filled with staccato drops of steamy water.

Majur watched the changing sky with dread. “The darkness has answered, it is coming.”

\-------------

The first thing Giles was aware of was the cold. Next he felt pain coursing through him with each breath and motion. The room was still black, but he heard the storm raging outside and wondered how long he’d been unconscious. He tried to pull himself into a sitting position against the wall but any attempt to move his shoulder caused his vision to swim, so he remained where he was.

He was so thirsty.

_Scrape_

Giles’ heart began to hammer in his chest painfully as the door creaked open, filling the room with a dark red glow. He tried to move away as the creature reached a clawed hand out to him. “It is time. The darkness has come.”

Giles gasped as the Debbouch pulled him up on unsteady feet and dragged him up the stairs, to the room utilized for the first spell. It threw Giles against the far wall and bolted the door.

“W-what happens now?” Giles couldn’t believe how difficult it had been just to speak those few words. His breathing was becoming more erratic with each breath.

The demon lowered itself to the floor and placed its hand flat on Giles’ chest.

“Your heart beats oddly. Not much time left for it. No matter. When the darkness takes you, the spell will sustain you until it is time for me to draw the darkness from you.”

Giles used every last bit of strength he possessed and lashed out with a kick, glancing a blow to the demon’s throat. It fell back and growled in rage. Giles lay still, his strength gone, trying desperately to catch his breath. “I w-will fight you i-in anyway t-that I am a-able to. I will n-not subm-mit to you.” He knew he was going to die, he only hoped that once the darkness was in him, that he could control it enough to keep this monster from ever achieving its goal of freedom.

The Debbouch watched him as he spoke, its rage growing. Without warning it lashed out, driving its claws into his already damaged shoulder. Giles’ body convulsed with the force of the attack and his vision swam as he bit his tongue, letting only a loud hiss escape his throat.

“We will soon see just how strong you are, human.” The demon placed its other hand on Giles’ chest and this time began to chant; its voice rising, calling the darkness to him.

The air grew deathly still and then filled with a blood red haze that began to swirl and howl, faster and louder with each word the demon spoke. The words tumbled from the demon again and again. The darkness grew, spinning faster and faster, the howling so loud Giles thought he would go mad from it. Doors split, walls cracked and the darkness screamed for blood. The air grew thick and dank, smelling of death and decay. Giles felt it pressing on him, a physical weight, crushing him. It was seeping into him, searing him. His eyes snapped open as he began to shake violently. His skin was the color of ash and his eyes clouded until finally the bright green eyes filled with blood and he saw nothing but the darkness that was engulfing him. The pain was more than he could bear. He was completely surrounded by it now. The weight of it crushing him more and more as it continued to leach into him.

The demon withdrew its claws, stepped back, and spoke the final command. The air became charged and crackled. A bolt of energy shot out, slamming into Giles’ chest. He cried out in agony as he felt bones snap. It now filled him completely, threatening to tear him apart from the inside. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t move, all he could do was scream. And as the darkness began to burn into his veins and his lungs, he knew he’d never stop screaming until he was dead.

\--------------------------

No one moved as they listened to the painful sounds emanating from inside the lighthouse. Buffy felt her blood freeze as she listened to him. “Please, get me in there. God, I have to get in there.” She whirled and shouted, “Do the spell, now!” She pointed at Angel and Wes. “See, Wes is the human and the magic and Angel is the demon, so what do they do?”

Majur cast sad eyes towards her. “Slayer, it will not open that way.”

Buffy cried out in rage and her hand was around his throat in an instant. “You said it was the way to open the door. Now do it or I’m gonna use you for a battering ram.”

Angel and Wes cast nervous glances between them before Angel assented and intervened. “Buffy, let him go.” He gently pulled her back as she reluctantly released Majur. “We need him right now Buffy, killing him won’t help Giles.”

Her reply was cut off as the lighthouse suddenly became deadly quiet, even the air had stopped moving. Everything was still. The silence filled them with more terror than the sounds of his pain had.

Buffy’s eyes widened and filled with tears and her heart clenched. “What does that mean? He’s not … ” She grabbed Majur again, pleading with him, “I have to go to him. Please, please don’t leave him in there alone. He needs me. Do you understand? He needs me. I have to help him.”

Majur turned his gaze down, not able to see the pain in her eyes but didn’t speak.

Wesley understood what he wasn’t telling her. “Buffy, he can’t do the spell.” He turned to Majur. “If I correctly understood your explanation to Buffy, the spell is the blood. But it must be the blood of lovers, yes?”

Majur nodded. “Yes, that is so. I never thought this would happen. I only wanted to avenge my mate, not harm others.”

Buffy stood there, letting the words filter into her brain again and again and again. She couldn’t accept this. “No, this can’t be happening, I-”

She was cut off by a cracking sound that grew louder and louder. They all turned towards the lighthouse. A large crack had begun near the base and was slowly crawling up the wall. It was soon joined by another.

Buffy shook her head. “This is so not good. We have to get in before it finishes the spell.”

Angel had remained silent, not knowing how say what he needed to say. And this was definitely not the way he wanted to say it. “Buffy, I think I know a way we can do the spell. It should work. I-if I do it with Wes.”

Both Buffy and Wes looked at him in confusion. Buffy however, rallied quickly, grabbed him and Wes and dragged them to the lighthouse door. Angel pulled a knife out of his pocket and looked cautiously at Wes. “You do understand don’t you? Why this will work?” He reached out a hand but dropped it. “I’ve been meaning to tell you for a long time. I just never found the right moment.”

Wesley rubbed his forehead and sighed. “Well, death and apocalypse do bring forth all sorts of revelations. Make the cuts, Angel, this discussion can wait, Rupert cannot.” His eyes were warm, cutting the sting of his words.

Angel made a shallow cut in the palm of his hand before doing the same to Wes’. He looked up to see a stunned Buffy watching with wide eyes. He sighed knowing there would be more than one long conversation to be faced.

“What now? He asked Majur.

“The blood must touch the door in the same instant. If love for each other lives within you, the door will open.”

Buffy snorted, “Talk about the ultimate lie detector.” She glanced at the upper part of the lighthouse. “Hurry guys.”

Wes nodded as he and Angel faced each other, raising bloodied hands towards the door. Their eyes locked as their hands inched closer to the scarred wood. “Now,” Angel commanded and their hands connected with the door, fusing to it for an instant, before both Angel and Wes felt the spell working. Warmth filled them both and Wes’ skin began to tingle. The door cracked before it broke in two, sending them reeling backward.

Buffy ran to the opening and passed through it. She ran back, signaling impatiently for them to join her inside. Wes stopped halfway to the door; “We need the swords.” He ran to Angel’s car, pulled three swords out of the boot and ran through the door to join the others.

\-----------------------------

Angel could smell blood; the scent so strong he had to fight to contain his demon. The knowledge that it was Giles’ blood was enough to give him the control he needed. His memories of tasting the Watcher’s blood brought intense remorse and guilt. He would not fail this man again.

In front of him, Buffy was frantically kicking each door out of its frame as she made her way up the stairs. She gripped the sword tightly as her heart beat harshly with each empty room found. She kicked in another one and couldn’t breathe as she saw a pool of blood. The sword hung limply in her hand as she walked slowly into the darkened room. A torn piece of blood-soaked fabric lay nearby and she could see the rich green color on a small corner. Buffy set aside the sword, knelt down and picked up the remnant with shaky hands. The fabric was cool in her hand and she felt the sticky texture; blood coated her hand as she clenched it to her.

She felt rather than heard the others behind her as she picked up the sword and wrapped the fabric tightly around the hilt before turning to find Angel and Wes regarding her with concern. “It’s part of his shirt.” Buffy said but didn't elaborate further, instead she closed her eyes and reached out with her senses. Her eyes snapped open when she felt him, surrounded by pain and fading. He was leaving her. “No!” She screamed, terror and anger washing over her. Buffy flew by Angel and Wes and raced to the top of the stairs, leaving a stunned Angel and Wes to follow.

They reached the top of the stairs and saw light escaping from under the closed door. Buffy motioned them to stand back and lashed out with a kick, smashing the door to fragments. Wes and Angel ran inside and the huge demon turned away from Giles at the sound of the door shattering and roared in outrage.

Buffy ran in and saw the demon rushing at Angel and Wes. It roughly shoved Angel away as Wes raised his sword and slashed its arm. The Debbouch hissed angrily and raised a clawed hand cutting a deep slash down Wesley’s forearm. He cried out in pain as he dropped his sword and fell back against the wall.

“Wesley!” Angel reacted instantly, vamping out and striking with his sword. He severed two clawed digits from the demon’s right hand, sending it reeling back, howling.

The chaos around her faded to background noise and her heart stopped when she saw Giles lying so still and surrounded by a blanket of fine red mist. She clenched the sword in her hand but she was no longer aware of the fight happening next to her. All she could see was Giles. Buffy felt sick as she forced herself to walk to him, dropping to her knees next to him. “Giles, can you hear me? Wake up, Giles, please. Oh, God please, wake up.”

She touched his face gently, only to pull back sharply as the red mist moved when she touched him. Tentatively, she slowly touched his cheek. The mist parted, moving away from her hand, revealing ashen skin. Buffy let out a gasp and placed her other hand on his wrist, feeling for a pulse, almost crying in relief when she found one. Swallowing thickly she gently ran her hand over his shoulder for a better look, the mist parting like rippling sand. There was so much blood, his shoulder looked as if it had been ripped open and his chest … “No, oh no,” Whispered, pained words of fear. His chest was badly burned and there was too much blood.

Angel looked quickly around. Buffy was kneeling next to the prone figure of her Watcher. He looked ghastly. Angel knew Buffy would be of no use unless the demon went near Giles. He sensed the demon moving and lashed out with his sword, sending it further back against the wall. His yellowed eyes never left the demon as he spoke. “Buffy, you and Wes get him out of here. Get him down to the door. I can deal with this.”

However, it was Wes who responded, not Buffy. “No, Angel, I’m not leaving you behind.”

The demon’s gaze was boring into Angel, willing him to move first. Angel knew that if he became distracted he was dead. “Wes, go. I can’t do this with you in here. Get Giles down stairs. Now!”

The demon moved along the back wall, edging its way to Buffy and Giles. Angel moved with it, keeping his sword ready and himself between Giles and the demon. Angel bared his fangs and growled. “You can’t get to him. I won’t let you hurt him anymore. I won’t let you hurt any of them.”

The Debbouch growled in response but stilled, feeling the pain of its missing digits.

Buffy watched the stand-off, knowing she had few precious moment to get Giles out of there but somehow she couldn't seem to move her legs to stand. She took his hand gently in hers and studied his features, etching each one to memory. He was so grey, the color leached out of him. He was too still but she had felt that his heart still beat, which let hers start again.

Wes walked over to Buffy, keeping a watchful eye on the demon that Angel was keeping at bay.

“Buffy, we have to get him down the stairs. I can’t lift him alone.” Wes gasped in shock as he spared a glance to the fallen Watcher. “Lord, his shoulder looks like it’s been ripped in two.”

Buffy nodded as fear filled her eyes. “Wes, that mist, what is that? Is that hurting him?”

Nonplussed, Wesley replied, “I’m afraid I don’t know, Buffy.”

The demon hissed. “You will never get him away from me, Humans. You are trapped here with me. Even if you get him down the stairs you cannot get out. I will finish what I began. You cannot prevent me.” The demon’s voice was raspy but confident.

A voice from the door caused them to start. “No, they will succeed. I will not let you take anymore lives. I will not let you take this man from his mate.” Majur spoke quietly.

The demon grinned, baring its sharp teeth. “So you’ve come out of your watery hole have you?” The grin disappeared as the demon’s face became suffused by repressed rage. “I owe you many deaths, Hauffern. Perhaps you need to join your mate, yes?”

“Enough of this.” Buffy’s voice cut in. She eyed the Debbouch coldly. “I will not let you take him from me. Now, we only have one way out of this trap. And that’s through you.” She picked up the sword, rage pulling her to her feet. “And I don’t have a problem with that.” Before Angel could say anything, Buffy was standing next to him. “You can’t do it alone, Angel.”

Majur looked at the injured Watcher and walked over to where Wesley stood. “I can carry him. He is at greater risk if we do not get him away from this room.”

Wes nodded in agreement and Majur gently lifted Giles as Wes held Giles’ injured arm steady to keep the torn shoulder still. Both were alarmed to see that the mist surrounding Giles clung to him even as he was moved. They slowly made their way to the door and were soon carefully moving down the stairs.

The demon stayed quiet and watched as his source of freedom was taken from the room. It knew that the odds were not favorable and its sense of self-preservation kept it still. It would wait. It searched Buffy’s eyes, seeing her desire to be with her mate, her worry for him. “I can help you, human. I can open a door and let you and your mate out.”

Buffy’s eyes narrowed warily but she didn’t speak. “My name is Arjendor. Among my kind I am a soljrios. I can take the thoughts of others.”

Arjendor walked cautiously closer, its red eyes boring into her grey ones. “Ah, he is not your mate. Would you like to know his thoughts? The pain he feels when he thinks of you … Bu-ffy?” The demon bared its fangs at her sharp intake of breath.

Angel watched, his concern growing as Buffy started to shake.

She could feel it reaching into her mind and couldn’t move; powerless to stop it as it took her thoughts, reading her, separating her from herself.

Angel acted instantly, pushing Buffy roughly back and she hit the wall forcefully. “Leave her alone. I will not let you hurt her.” His yellow eyes glowed with rage and he landed a hard kick to Arjendor’s chest. The demon fell back and felt the connection to Buffy shatter as it struck the wall.

This time Angel gave it no time to recover. He charged the demon, his sword raised above his head and snarled, driving the blade down, piercing the weak flesh at the demon’s throat and embedding it in the stone floor below. Angel fell back, spent, as the demon howled in pain, its blood running down its armored skin. It wheezed as it desperately tried to remove the blade. Angel crawled backward, to Buffy, keeping his now human eyes on the demon.

They watched together as the demon stilled and the wheezing ceased.

Buffy touched Angel’s shoulder. “Thanks. I should have listened to you. I almost made us demon chow.”

Angel grinned. “I think my demon is better than that demon any day.”

Buffy snorted, “Oh yeah. Let’s go see our guys.” Buffy shivered a little as she realized what she said and gave Angel a curious look. “You and Wes. That is weird on so many levels.”

Angel cocked an eyebrow as they hurried down the stairs. “If it helps any, it’s still pretty damn weird to me, too.”

Buffy smiled sadly in response, her thoughts already turned to how Giles had looked before Wes and Majur had taken him out of the room.

They reached the bottom and finding the lighthouse empty, they approached the door cautiously before venturing out in the darkness of early evening. The sky was filled with thousands of stars that glowed brightly, oblivious to the malevolent storm that had twisted nature so cruelly.

Buffy began to panic as she looked around and saw no one. “Angel, where is he? Where did they take him?” Before he could respond, she ran a short way down the lane and looked first in the Jeep, then in Angel’s car. Soon, Angel joined her. “We’ll find them, Buffy.” He was worried about Wes as well as Giles but he needed to keep Buffy calm.

They heard a sound off to the side, near the woods and saw a Hauffern emerge. “Please, I am Daslon. You will come with me, to Majur and your companions.”

The Hauffern led them to a clearing deep inside the forest. Buffy cried with relief when she saw Giles and ran to him but before she could reach him, Majur stopped her. “Slayer, no, you cannot enter the field.” He pointed to the shimmering light surrounding Giles. “He is protected now. He is close to death, Slayer."

Buffy’s eyes filled with tears as she watched him, lying there, still covered with blood. “Hospital, we-”

Majur touched her arm gently. “Slayer. Do human healers have magic?”

Buffy turned startled eyes to Majur as Angel and Wes walked over to join her. “You okay, Wes?”

“Yes, Buffy.” He indicated the healer that was now hovering near Giles, chanting. “He is a remarkably capable healer.” His wound had been cleansed and wrapped with a cloth.

“Can he help Giles? I mean Majur is right. Our doctors don’t really do the magic bit.”

All conversation stopped as the healer rose and strode purposefully toward Buffy. He didn’t speak but quickly reached out and placed his palm on her forehead. He chanted softly for a moment before removing his hand and watched her intently.

“You are the way.” He glanced briefly at Majur. “Bring her.” He turned and rapidly walked back to the edge of the field protecting Giles.

“Come, Slayer. He will explain all to you. But to you alone. You must trust. We want only to save your Giles, not bring more harm.”

Buffy nodded and gave Angel and Wes a quick hug. “Thanks guys. Without you, he’d already be dead. Nothing I can do or say can tell you how very much that means to me.” She walked quickly to the healer, not giving them a chance to respond.

Angel took Wes’ uninjured arm and pulled him along as he walked. “Come on, let’s go find someplace to sit while we wait. And you should be resting anyway.”

Wes smiled, gave one last look towards Giles and sent a silent prayer to the Powers that Giles be spared.

\------------

Buffy sat on the ground next to the healer, her eyes glued to Giles. The Hauffern gently touched her face, drawing her attention back to him. Warm eyes regarded her sadly. “Slayer, I am Groslor. I am the healer for my tribe. I have little knowledge, however of human healing. Your Giles will need that. I can do what I can for him. But I cannot heal his physical injuries which are severe. I have not the knowledge.”

Her forehead creased with worry as she looked back at Giles. She was so desperate to touch him. “I-is he going to die then? I – why does he look like that? Why won’t he wake up?” She was getting more and more hysterical. “That red misty stuff, why won’t it go away? What is it? What did that thing do to him?”

He was so still. She couldn’t look anymore, couldn’t think of what could happen. How could she tell Dawn? And Willow and Xander? How could she tell the she let him die? How could she live without him when she no longer wanted to?

Groslor touched her arm, needing all her attention. “I do not know if he will die or not.” He indicated the shimmering haze around Giles. “This is to protect him from the thing within him, not from anything out here.”

Buffy felt her throat clench in fear. “What thing? What’s in him? Get it out!”

The healer laid a calming hand on her arm. “Please, let me explain. It is not easy, Slayer, to tell you this. What is within him is evil. True evil and it is strong. The magic the Debbouch called in an effort to free itself now resides within your Giles. The red mist, as you call it, is what remains. The protection spell I’ve placed around him is preventing it from invading him further. The rest is already within him. It has done him great harm.” Groslor took a deep breath as a tear escaped Buffy’s eye and crawled slowly down her cheek. “Even so, we cannot remove it from him. If we do, he will die.”

Buffy cried out and was up and running before she even thought about it. The healer’s voice was sharp as he called after her. “Slayer, stop!”

Buffy froze in her tracks and sank to the ground, shaking with silent sobs. Groslor walked over and sat down next to her. “You are the way, Slayer. You have it within you to change that which destroys him. And once changed, it can restore him and he will be stronger than any that might try to do him harm. I have seen his heart, Slayer. It is a pure one. Had I any doubt otherwise, I would never even attempt this.” He looked hard at Buffy. “Such power can corrupt. He has such been tested before and failed. And in doing so, he has reverence for it. It is woven into the foundation of him and all who choose to look may see it.”

Buffy swallowed hard. “How- how do I help him. Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

“He is not your mate, is he Slayer?”

Buffy shook her head. “I do love him. I-I just haven’t told him yet.”

The healer nodded sagely, “It is as I thought.” He rose, motioned her to join him and walked right to the edge of the spell. He sat her down. “I will open a small doorway for you. When you are inside, you must not for any reason leave. If you do, you risk his life. Do you understand?”

Again, Buffy nodded her understanding. “Y-yes, I understand. What do I do?”

Groslor reached for the bundle lying next to him and pulled out a knife, a cloth and a jar of some thick substance. “You must mix your blood with his. You possess the strength of the light, a true soul and a fiercely loyal heart. As a Slayer, you were created to fight just such an evil as that which keeps him imprisoned with himself.” He handed her the knife and picked up the jar. “This will help you. It is a mixture of seaweed, ground coral and other secret things. It will enhance your deepest emotions, making them stronger. Place this on your hands before you make the cuts to your palms. Once you touch him, you will not be able to remove your hands. If you do, again, you risk doing him more harm. You must reach him. You cannot win this alone. He must accept what you offer him. There is no other way.”

Buffy looked at him alarmed. “That’s it? That all the direction I get? What about how the hell I change badness to goodness? Any thoughts on that? Or-or how I find – this doesn’t make any damn sense to me. Tell me what to do.”

The healer continued as if she’d not spoken and handed her the jar and the cloth. “Apply the mixture with the cloth. It has been treated with the activating solution. There is no more I can tell you, Slayer. It is not my battle to fight. I have given you the weapons but you must be the one. He loves you. And will only fight for you. No one else, nothing else. I feel the pain his heart was in before this. You have wounded his soul, Slayer. Only you can heal it.”

Buffy flushed in shame and snapped at him, “What are you? It’s like talking to Yoda. How do you know all this? The Force?”

Groslor smiled warmly at her. “I am a healer.”

Her eyes narrowed and she nodded shortly, holding the items tightly to her. “Open it up.”

The healer spoke softly and Buffy felt a rush of air in front her. She crawled forward until she was on her knees next to Giles and let out a small sob as she looked at him. He was so broken, inside and out. Buffy leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to his cold lips. “I love you, Giles,” she whispered as she pulled away. She looked at her hands and her brow furrowed. She had to maintain contact with him once she began, so she straddled his thighs, wishing she were doing this under very different circumstances.

She opened the jar and picked up the cloth and smeared the cold mixture over both of her hands. Buffy closed the jar; set the cloth aside, picked up the knife and quickly sliced both of her palms, wincing as she set the knife down. Turning her palms, she saw the blood welling, pooling in the cup of her hands.

With one last look to the healer, she leaned forward on her knees, pressing her palms flat against Giles’ bloodied chest.

The reaction was instant. His eyes snapped open and she almost pulled her hands away, horrified by what she saw. The whole of his eyes was a deep dark red. It was all she could do to breathe. Buffy could feel the evil presence that was trying so savagely to take Giles away from her, she felt it in her mind, trying to force her away and she held on tighter. Her palms and forearms started to burn and she tore her eyes from his and saw the red mist starting to expand, crawling up her arms.

The pain took her breath and she used all her control to keep from pulling her hands away. “Giles, Giles you have to help me, I know you’re in there. Please, help me.” Her throat was dry and she began to shake from the force of what she was feeling. She didn’t know what to do, how to reach him. How could she control this evil magic that she didn’t even understand? Her thoughts halted as the pain slid up her shoulders. If she didn’t do something soon, she’d end up just like Giles.

\-----------------------

Angel guided Wesley to a large tree and both settled on the ground, watching the events in the clearing. Angel watched as Buffy ran to her Watcher only to be stopped by the healer. He was about to get up when a sharp gasp drew his attention back to Wes. The injured man was trying to find a comfortable position without much success. Without thinking about it, Angel placed his left arm around Wesley’s shoulders and pulled him close, shifting him so his back was resting against his chest.

  
Wesley tensed as Angel pulled him near, but relaxed as soon as the vampire’s arm closed around him protectively. Angel closed his eyes, needing to control his emotions. “Better?”

Wes merely nodded in response, unable to speak.

Angel stretched out, letting Wesley settle into him more comfortably. “Wes, I never expected this. I knew I felt something— strong, for you, but I never imagined this would happen,” Angel kissed him gently on the temple, “or that you would feel the same. I never thought it possible, never.”

Wesley shifted in Angel’s arms carefully so as to keep from jostling his injured arm. Not able to form a response, Wes swallowed and his eyes strayed to Buffy and Giles. “I don’t think Buffy will survive this if Rupert dies, Angel,” he said softly.

Angel pressed a kiss to the dark hair, his expression filled with concern. “I know, Wes, I know.”

\---------------------

Buffy looked down at Giles; there was nothing of him in those eyes, nothing. She closed her eyes and reached for him, picturing him in her mind, letting the pain and everything else fall away. There was only Giles. She let the sense memory wash over her. The way he laughed, the way his eyes danced when he smiled; all the things that made him Giles.

There.

Just on the edge of her awareness, she sensed him but she couldn’t find him. Buffy went farther and farther into him, feeling his pain, his sorrow and his anger; so many emotions jumbled within him. So much he kept hidden. She tried to get past it, but she was drowning in it. This is where he was, behind all of it.

She was getting closer, feeling his presence here; he was struggling to get out of the darkness engulfing him. Buffy had to get in, she had to. She could feel the darkness trying to push her away and she pushed forward, desperate to reach that part that was still Giles. She was so close now.

Her eyes shot open and she looked down as Giles began to shake violently. His hand grabbed her wrist, trying to pull her off of him. The grip was unnaturally strong and she knew it wasn’t Giles. She dug her knees into the ground bracing herself, refusing to leave. “No! I won’t go.”

Those red eyes filled with awareness and Buffy saw Giles struggling to break free. The hand on her wrist tightened and the red haze around grew brighter. The brighter it grew the less she saw of him reflected. She cried out, “Stay with me, Giles! You have to stay with me!” She had to reach him, she had to and she suddenly knew the way. Love. That is what made her strong, that was her light. All she had to do was let it shine for him, give him a beacon to find his way back.

Buffy reached out again, only this time, with her heart, letting her instincts guide her. She let it fill her to overflowing and let it spill out immersing him in it, as it grew stronger, brighter, cracking the darkness.

Her light grew brighter still and the few cracks became many. In the distance she felt the hand fall away from her wrist and the body beneath her still. She heard an unearthly cry of rage as more light breached the darkness. In the distance she heard Giles cry out in pain and her heart cried in fury, unleashing a blinding light that completely shattered the darkness, filling every crevice with light. She reached out with heart, her mind calling to his.

She felt how drained and weak he was, how afraid of what was happening to him. She needed to feel him and called out to him tenderly to him. “You have to come to me, Giles. I understand now. I know what to do. Let me do this for you. This pain I can take away. All you have to do is reach out for me.” She was pleading with him now. “Trust me, Giles, please, trust me.”

She felt it. His touch was tentative, unsure but unmistakably Giles. The instant she felt it she latched onto him, holding him to her tightly, letting her love envelope him. He struggled, not understanding what she was doing but she didn’t let go. “Stay with me Giles, stay with me, feel me.”

He reached for her, pulling her to him and they held to each other as the fury raged around them. Buffy’s touch gave him the strength to fight; to reclaim what had been taken from him as her light surrounded him, protecting him, burning away the darkness. He felt her in his veins, filling him with life and hope and love. His breathing was becoming shallow as the light continued to grow. It was blinding, pulsating, vibrant. It was too much to be contained and finally exploded; throwing Buffy off of him to land a few yards away.

She was on her feet instantly running back to him and stopped; stunned. He was surrounded by light. White, hot, yet still red tinged in places. There was a blinding flash and then the light was gone. Buffy could hardly breathe; it was gone. Nothing but Giles. No red mist, no light. Only Giles. She knelt down next to him and gasped, unable to believe what she saw. A white scar ran down the length of his chest. She touched it tentatively. It was warm, as if it had just been burned into him somehow. But nothing else, no mark anywhere on him. When she found her voice, she called his name. “Giles?”

Buffy felt a touch on her shoulder and jumped. “Slayer, let him sleep. If he wakes now, he will be in much pain.”

Not taking her eyes off Giles she asked the healer. “Pain? From what? Is he, is it over? Will he be okay?”

“He must heal now.” He knelt over the Watcher and spoke softly. Giles groaned in response before a tremor ran through him and he stilled once again.

Buffy pulled Groslor away from him, her eyes flashing with rage. “What was that? What did you do to him?”

“I did him no harm. He was close to waking. It is not yet time for him to do so. He has been through much. His mind and body are still quite fragile.”

Buffy knelt next to her Watcher. “I don’t understand. Is he okay or not? I mean, how – there’s only a scar on his chest and it was – and his shoulder – what? Does he need a doctor? I mean a people doctor?” Buffy knew she was rambling but she simply could not seem to pull together a single thought.

Groslor sank down on the grass next to her. “How it happened, I cannot explain. Except to say the magic was changed. It is a part of him now. He has been somewhat restored as a result of that. That his physical injuries have for the most part been healed was most unexpected. I do not think a human doctor would do him any service at this time.”

He gently turned Buffy until she faced him. “Take him home, Slayer. Let him rest and heal. Let the magic return what it took from him. He will need you when he wakes. To him, this all will have just happened. I do not think it will be something he will easily forget.” He touched her cheek tenderly, “That is why you must be there for him. He will wake, Slayer. I do not know how much he will still be damaged. Only he can tell you that. His wounds will not be visible now.”

Tears pricked her eyes. “Giles has never been big on sharing badness. At least not his.” She looked at the gentle rise and fall of his chest. “I’ll be there. I’m not gonna screw this up again. I’m not. I can’t.”

Buffy felt the tears fall. “Groslor, his eyes, please, I need to see his eyes. I have to know.” The healer nodded his understanding and gently pulled back Giles’ eyelid to reveal the beautiful green she so loved.

\-----------------------

Buffy heard her name being whispered followed by a gentle pressure on her shoulder and responded before she was even fully awake. “I’m up.” Her voice was groggy as she sat bolt upright in the chair. “I mean, I wasn’t asleep.”

Willow sighed. Buffy looked so ragged. She’d hardly left Giles’ side since they’d brought him back. She motioned for Buffy to come with her out into the hall. Buffy shook her head and whispered, “I don’t want him to be alone, Will.”

Willow shook her head and motioned to someone outside the room and Xander walked in. “I’ll stay with him today, Buffy. You go with Willow. And yes, if he so much as twitches, I’ll get you.” Xander smiled sadly at her before looking at the still figure sleeping so deeply in the bed. He shook his head. Three days and nothing. No change. Except in Buffy. She was sinking more and more with each hour he failed to wake up.

He turned to watch Willow lead Buffy out of the room before again directing his attention to Giles, taking the chair Buffy had been keeping vigil in. He reached out and gently gripped the older man’s hand and spoke softly to him. “You gotta come back from wherever you are G-man. You’re really startin’ to worry us.” His voice broke with frayed emotions. “W-we miss you Giles. I miss you.” He lowered his head to rest on the mattress, but never released that once strong hand from his.

Buffy walked wearily out into the hall with a glance back at Giles before Willow literally pulled her into her own bedroom and sat her down on her bed. “This is where you are to sleep today, Buffy.” As Buffy made to protest, Willow hushed her with a stern glance. “No, Buffy. You can’t keep doing this.” Her features softened as tears welled in her friend’s eyes.

“Buffy, we love him too. You’ll be no good to him when,” she stressed the word, “he wakes up if you don’t get some rest. You spend most of the day sitting with him.” She brushed a stray blonde curl back from Buffy’s face and smiled faintly. “And Dawn needs her sister. Tara and I just love her, but she needs you. This is hard on her too, Buff. She loves Giles.”

Buffy patted Willow’s hand and walked over to the window. She rubbed her sleep-deprived eyes. “I know that. I just- you didn’t see him, Will. What that thing did to him. He was torn to pieces. I can still see him that way. And his eyes,” she shuddered, “I really thought-” and she began crying.

Willow was at her side in an instant, holding her, shushing her, before pulling her back to the bed. Buffy shook her head, focusing herself again. “Groslor. I think I need to get him. Maybe, he can … ” She trailed off as she noticed Willow’s look. “What?”

“Angel did that yesterday, remember? He said it could take several days. Buff, we’ve done all we can do. It’s up to Giles now.” Before the exhuasted woman could protest, Wilowl took charge, pushing her down on the bed. “Sleep, Buff. You need it. Xander’ll wake you, I promise, if Giles does anything. Tara and I will see to Dawn. And when you wake up, you’ll feel better, you’ll see.”

Buffy dug the backs of her hands into her eyes and nodded, giving into her body’s need for rest. She was asleep as soon as she lay down. A tear fell from Willow’s bright green eyes. “Oh, Buffy.” She shook her head and pulled the blanket from the foot of the bed and covered the exhausted Slayer. “Sleep tight, Buff.” She closed the bedroom door behind her and went in search of Tara and Dawn.

\-------------------------

Wes leaned back on the couch, setting aside the book he’d been studying for the past hour. He’d been researching most of the day, stopping only occasionally to check on Rupert and refresh his tea. He let out a tired groan, massaged bleary eyes and listened to the gentle rustling of wind through the trees and crickets chirping, welcoming in the night. He closed his eyes, letting the tranquility wash over him and before long he drifted into a deep, much needed sleep.

A cool hand gently touched his face, startling him awake instantly, and he sat up quickly.

Angel’s brows drew together in concern. “Wes, it’s just me. Relax.”

Wesley eased back against the sofa again, stretching out his legs over the coffee table. “Ah, sorry about that. You startled me.” He looked quizzically at the vampire. “I thought you were patrolling for Buffy again tonight?”

Angel cocked an eyebrow as he leaned back throwing his legs over the other man’s. “I did, Wes. It’s well after two in the morning.”

Wes’ eyes widened in surprise. “Good Lord. I’d no idea. I must have drifted off. Any activity on patrol?”

Angel laughed softly, shaking his head in response before pulling Wes until he felt his reassuring weight against his side and warm breath against his throat. Angel was so content it took him several minutes to realize the house was completely silent. “Wes, where is everyone?” Even at this late hour, someone was usually up and it was usually Buffy.

Wesley sank into the cool comfort of his embrace, fighting the sleep that was threatening to claim him yet again. He answered groggily; “Willow and Tara took Dawn with them and somehow managed to get Buffy to sleep.” He yawned before continuing, “Anya was here earlier and Xander is in with Rupert. At least that was the status before my unexpected nap.”

Angel smiled. “Any luck with the research?”

A frustrated sound was his answer as Wesley reluctantly pulled away and reached for one of the books haphazardly stacked on the floor. “Yes and no.” He began flipping pages as Angel looked over his shoulder. “Ah, here it is.” He directed Angel’s gaze to a section titled ‘metaplasia incantations’.

Angel grimaced, “Uh, Wes, I don’t know that I can read about metaphysical magic at two in the morning.”

Wesley let out a puff of laughter. “One should always be capable of researching at any given time, Angel.” His eyes lit with mischief.

Angel groaned and dropped his head back on the sofa. “Please, Wes, just sum it up for me.”

Wes arched an eyebrow but acquiesced. “The red mist. I’ve found out what it was. It was an actual being, one without form. More of a manifestation.”

Angel was watching him intently.

“It has never been named. They are very rare, only two recorded sightings in the past two hundred years.” Wes saw the question in Angel’s eyes. “How this demon knew to call it, I don’t know. All I know for certain is that the – entity – for want of a better word, is harmless until it joins with a corporeal life form. One the magical abilities. And once joined, it strengthens the magic, whatever form of magic that is, to untold levels.”

Angel’s eyes widened. “And that thing or what ever is now part of Giles?"

Wesley nodded solemnly.

Angel's eyes hardened. "Can it hurt him? Control him?”

Dark eyes regarded him. "Control him, no. Hurt him, I don't know," Wesley said honestly but added, "Rupert is a strong personality. He has many deep emotions and not all of those are comendable ones. He has a great deal of darkness in him. He'll have to learn great control." Seeing the doubt in Angel's eyes, he continued. "He's already defeated his inner demons once, Angel, and I think he's strong enough to do so again if the need arises." His eyes warmed as he clasped Angel's hand. "Besides, he won't be alone this time."

Angel cocked an eyebrow, nodding slowly, thinking, remembering. “Well that would explain why Giles healed so fast. Wes, just how strong do you think he is now,” he paused before adding, “and what kinds of magic was in him to begin with?”

The Watcher sighed in response. “That’s the part I really have no idea about. Though –” He broke off abruptly as terror filled cries pierced the quiet night. Both men were on their feet in an instant, running up the stairs.

\------------------------

Day had turned to night and still Buffy slept. But even in her sleep, Buffy could hear Giles’ cries of pain. Only somehow seeming louder than normal. She tossed on the bed caught in that place not fully waking.

“Buffy!” Xander yelling her name woke her instantly and she was on her feet running to the source.

Her breath caught and she froze. “Oh God.” He was awake, horribly awake. Wes and Angel on either side of him, trying to keep him still as she again heard the sounds from her nightmare turned real.

Xander was now practically sitting on Giles as Wes spoke, trying desperately to calm him down. He snapped at Buffy, “Don’t just stand there, dammit, help us.”

Her reaction was instant. She ran to the bed, pushing Xander out of her way. Giles’ eyes were shut tight as he struggled to get out of her iron grip. “Giles, its Buffy. Open your eyes.” At the sound of her voice he stilled, but couldn’t open his eyes. His mind was still in that room, his chest and shoulder burned horribly and he was gasping for breath.

Buffy felt his panic rise and tried to pull him into the now with her. She gently kissed his warm cheek and brushed her face along the length of his. “Giles. It’s over. You’re safe now. You’re safe.”

Giles took a deep breath at her touch, filling his lungs with a cleansing breath and opened his eyes slowly. Her beautiful face filled his vision. Unbidden tears leaked from the corners of his eyes as he reached out to touch her, only to hiss in pain as his shoulder moved.

Buffy laid his hand back by his side gently. “Not yet, Giles. Groslor said you might still feel that.” She turned to Angel. “Get him a glass of water and put in that stuff Groslor gave us for him.” Angel nodded, pulling Wes out of the room with him while Xander went in search of the phone to call Anya and Willow.

Giles had eyes for Buffy only. The more awake he became, however, the more at sea he was. Taking in his surroundings, he knew he was in Buffy’s home. In the master bedroom. He simply could not fathom how he'd come to be there, much less how he came to still be living, when he could still feel his death in the deepest part of his soul.

“Buffy,” he began but a coughing fit took him over. He tried again, his voice rusty and weak from disuse. “Buffy, what happened? Where … the Debbouch ... ” His eyes closed as he vividly remembered claws sinking into his flesh and his right had moved involuntarily to touch the injured left shoulder. His eyes shot open and he turned, needing to confirm what his hand had not felt. He gasped as he saw nothing, no marks at all. He turned bewildered eyes to a patient Buffy. “I don’t understand – I remember – I feel it. I-I did – I-I am I –”

Buffy shushed him with a soft touch to his lips. “I’ll explain everything when you’re stronger. I promise you that. And no, you’re not crazy. It really happened.” She leaned down and kissed him. As she pulled back he saw her eyes fill with pain. “I thought I’d lost you. I was so afraid. So very afraid that thing would take you.” Tears filled her eyes and Giles touched her face.

“I’m here, Buffy.” He shook his head confusedly, “At least most of me is. I-it’s rather difficult to explain. I – something has changed. I don’t understand. Why does it still-” He stopped abruptly, realizing what he was about to say.

So Buffy finished it for him. “So why does it still hurt? It’s okay. And things have changed. But you aren’t up for this yet. Please, just trust me.”

Before he could say anything, Angel, Wes and Xander walked back into the room. Wesley handed the glass to Buffy and smiled down at Giles. “Welcome back, Rupert. You scared the bloody hell out of us.”

Xander chimed in, his eyes a little moist. “Yeah, Giles. And I gotta say don’t ever do that to us again.”

Giles merely raised an eyebrow in response; he really was tired and couldn’t seem to even raise his head any longer. Buffy saw the weariness in him and shooed the others out. “Okay guys, he’s wiped. Give him some space okay?”

Xander nodded and the trio left the room, closing the door behind them. By the time Buffy looked back at him, Giles was asleep again. She sighed and set the glass down on the bedside table. She would be there when he woke up.

\-----------------

Buffy felt a weight lift as she watched Giles sleeping, knowing that this time, he would wake up. She started thinking of all the things that she’d need to do, to help him. First was Groslor. Giles would want to talk to him she had no doubt. Part of her had hoped he wouldn’t have remembered what happened at the lighthouse and shehe frowned, wondering how he would deal with all that had happened to him. Giles was an intensely private man who had just been through a very exposed trauma, which included having his Slayer rummaging around in his head. Buffy propped her elbows on the edge of the bed and cradled her head between her hands, as her look became pensive. She just hoped he’d give her a chance to explain what an idiot she was and give her one last chance to make things right. That’s all she needed, just one more chance. Her plea was soft, filled with longing. “Just one more chance, Giles. I promise I won’t screw it up this time. I promise.”

\--------------------------------

Xander let his shoulders slump as he felt the tension ease from his tired body. He never wanted to hear Giles in that much pain ever again. It had scared him, made him feel useless to help his friend. He hadn’t realized how worried and upset he’d been until Giles had finally awakened. All he wanted to do now was go home and hold Anya till he felt the world spin the right way again. As he walked into the kitchen with Wes and Angel, he fished his car keys out of his pocket. “Well, guys, I’m gonna head home. Anya’s waiting for me.”

Wes nodded and Angel asked, “Do you want me to take you? It’s late.”

Xander shook his head. “I’ll be fine. Just car door to home door. ‘Night, Wes, Angel.”

Wes waved goodbye as he opened the refrigerator door and Angel followed Xander to the door. “I’ll just walk you to the car.” Xander shrugged realizing there was no point in trying to stop him and the two walked out, leaving Wes on his own, foraging for food. He eyed the contents before sighing and closing the fridge door again and leaning against it instead. He heard the door open and Angel stepped into the room, locking the door behind him and leaning back against it, studying the man across the room from him.

Angel could see the weariness in Wes’ features and knew he needed rest. Everything else could wait. He broke the hypnotic atmosphere and walked purposefully across the kitchen, pulling the tired man to lean against him. “Come on, Wes. You need to get some sleep. You’ve been researching non-stop for days now.”

Wes stiffened as Angel pulled him into his embrace but relaxed as the concerned voice washed over him. He merely nodded in agreement and allowed Angel to guide him up the stairs to Buffy’s room. Wes mumbled a goodnight and withdrew from Angel but Angel caught his arm suddenly. Wes looked in looked in askance but did not try to pull away. Angel smiled in gratitude. “Just promise me one thing before you go off to dreamland.”

Wes looked at him warily. “And that would be?”

The vampire smiled at the his expression. “We give this a chance when we get home.” Before Wes could reply Angel added, “And that means not keeping it secret.”

Wesley took a deep breath. He’d been expecting this. “I promise.” He pulled out of Angel’s embrace and touched his face briefly, before walking into the room and closing the door, leaving Angel standing in hall, a warm smile on his face.

\---------------------------------

Buffy yawned, waking slowly to sunlight streaming into the room from the open window. She stood and stretching shoulders that were cramped from having slept curled up in the chair and worked the kinks out. She turned to the bed and her brain almost seized. Giles was gone. It was several seconds before she remembered to breathe and she took a deep shaky one before flying down the stairs in panic. Searching room by room, scaring the hell out of Wes, Angel, Willow and Dawn as she tore through the living room. Angel recovered first and snagged her arm before she got out of the room. “Buffy, he’s okay. He’s out back, sitting on the porch.”

Relief temporarily liquified her bones and she Buffy sank into Angel as she collected herself. It was several quiet moments before she pulled away, grinning sheepishly. “Um, sorry about that.”

Angel just shook his head while Dawn sniggered. Buffy glared at her sister and walked blithely past them to the kitchen. She looked out the window and saw him sitting on the bench swing, swaying slowly back and forth, gazing out at the bright sunny day. She walked to the door only to stop suddenly and pat her jeans pockets.

She ran back to her bedroom and retrieved a small worn box from the table and clenched it tightly in her fist and made her way back through the house to the back door once again. Only this time, she opened it and stepped outside, closing the door behind her.

At the sound of the door Giles’ head turned in her direction and he gave her an uncertain look before turning away again.

Buffy leaned against the wall, brows drawn in concern. “How’s the shoulder?”

His hand went to it absently, but still didn’t look back in her direction. His voice was flat. “Better than it has a right to be.” He shook his head absently. “I barely feel it now.”

Buffy walked the short distance to the swing and sat down next to him. Without hesitation, she took his hand in hers and pressed kiss to his cheek. “Hey, Giles.”

His startled expression almost made her laugh and before she lost her nerve she pressed the box into his hand. “Here. I wanted to give this to you that day at the lighthouse.”

He looked at it quizzically before snapping back the top. If possible he was even more confused by the contents. He pulled out the small chip. “Buffy? What is this?”

Unfaltering, she met his eyes. “Spike’s chip.”

A hundred different emotions went through him, each one skittering across his features, as he realized the implications of what this meant. His hand shook as he held tightly to the reality of what she’d done and when she’d have done it. Anger filled him as he remembered that day. His eyes were hard. “Why?”

Buffy pulled her legs up under her, trying hard not the shrink under the harsh stare. Still, she didn’t turn away. “I- it made sense at the time. I had the whole speech planned out. But what came out wasn’t what I wanted to say at all. I was gonna give you that and tell you,” she stopped, suddenly afraid but forced herself to say it. Barely above a whisper she forced out the stilted words. “A-and tell you that I loved you.”

His expression didn’t change and she was getting nervous. He stood up and walked out into the softly swaying grass only to have Buffy follow him a moment later. Before she could say anything he spoke. “When you came for me, I felt it. Felt your love.” There was awe in his voice. “I have never felt anything so incredibly powerful. It was the single event I so wanted to be real.” He turned to her suddenly and lifted the box in his hand. “So much doesn’t seem possible. As though part of an horrific nightmare from which I could not wake. But this, it was real wasn’t it? All of it?” Pain filled his voice as the images took the form of memories.

Buffy wrapped her arms tightly around his waist, holding him to her. “Yes. It all was real. And it’s all over.”

He pressed a kiss to her golden hair and whispered softly, “No, it’s not.”

Fear gripped her as she held tighter to him, as his arms closed around her shoulders. “You’re not evil, Giles.”

She felt him draw a shuddering breath. “I don’t know, Buffy.” He pulled her closer, needing to feel the reality of her, the lightness of her. “I can feel the strength of it.”

Buffy drew in a sharp breath and pulled back to look into troubled eyes. She caressed his cheek, seeing everything he was in those eyes. “Strength, yes. But not its strength, your strength, Giles, yours.” Buffy added softy, "Its always been there, you just lost it for awhile, didn't you know that?"

He gazed at her in wonder before dipping his head down and touching his lips to hers in a warm, wet union. Both were lost in the sensation, a mutual desire and need. And in that instant Buffy’s heart met his and took flight.

The End

**Author's Note:**

> Series notes –  
> BtVS – Giles has returned a second time. Most of season 6 has not happened. I only kept the parts I needed.
> 
> AtS – Kept Fred and Gunn around but season three really hasn't happened and there is no Connor.
> 
> Author notes – Thanks to Cat for the complete editing and assistance and also Deb for all of your comments, questions and editing skills. Without you my demon would have to have been named after Savvy
> 
> And a big, big, big thanks to Jac for the pic she made for it. It inspired me to finish. lol You are the best.
> 
> This was a bunny Milkie threw me and it grew and mutated into this as a belated birthday present for her. I finished it over a year ago but never posted it. ;-) 2004


End file.
